Dear Parents Of Transgender Children…
If you want your children to talk to you, make yourself easy to come to about these things.
Before I elaborate, let me say something first.
I don’t know where I’m getting the balls to do this all of a sudden, but when I made this account I wanted to keep my gender and pronouns ambiguous in my works. Now, I no longer care.
I still will not share my real name, but I am a transgender boy. I go by he/it pronouns.
Psst…
By the way, if you have a problem with it/its pronouns, I do not care about your opinion nor do I want to hear it. They are MY pronouns, and I can go by whatever the fuck I want. Also, you may have already deduced that I’m feminine from my profile picture. So, again, if you have a problem, I do not care. This is my identity and I do not owe you an explanation. Thank you.
Now that I’ve gotten that out of the way and you’re closer to seeing my motivation for writing this in its entirety, let’s continue.
Recently, I’ve been seeing adults on the internet saying shit like, “Ugh, why wouldn’t the school tell me my child is transgender?” or “Why wouldn’t my child talk to me about being transgender?”
There is a multitude of reasons why your child would not immediately come to you. Maybe they were working up the courage, maybe they weren’t sure how to tell you, etc. However, one thing is certain:
If you found out your child is out as transgender to everyone but you, that’s YOUR fault.
If your child felt safer coming out at school, you know, to people who do not have to love them unconditionally, ask yourself why that is.
The school did not “trans” your child, your child is not disrespecting you by not coming out to you, nor is the school at fault for not telling you. If you feel that way, that’s the problem.
Your child did not feel safe coming out to you, and that’s your fault. You didn’t make them feel like they could talk to you.
Again, there are plenty of reasons why, but the examples I made previously only apply if your kid didn’t come out to many others. If they did, it’s on you.
And I especially hate the argument I mentioned here.
“Ugh, why wouldn’t the school tell me my child is transgender?”
I don’t care what you think that is. It’s controlling, entitled, overbearing, and suffocating. The school does not have to tell you anything other than your child’s grades and general behavior. Unless your child plans to hurt themselves or someone else, that’s the only information they are REQUIRED to give you. Your child being transgender is not hurting anyone else or your child, therefore, the school does not need to tell you SHIT about it if the child wishes.
Do any of you know how it feels? To feel like you can’t be yourself anywhere without your controlling parent hearing about it? To feel like you will always be controlled by your parent? To feel like you have to tiptoe around your parent to use a different name and pronouns than the ones they decided for you because they’re too stupid to realize you didn’t have a say in your name, so it’s perfectly reasonable for you to dislike it?
Well, do you?
Because I do, which is why it pisses me off so many of you are so entitled to believe you’re in the right. You do not have control over our identities. Instead of worrying about what name and pronouns we decide to go by, worry about making sure we’ll still talk to you after we turn eighteen and not leave your ass in a nursing home and never visit.
You may think I’m being harsh, and I don’t care. It won’t get through your thick skulls if I’m nice.
Mutter “Kids these days don’t know how to respect their elders.” or “Gen Z is so entitled.” and shit like that all you want. I don’t care. I’m done caring about what you think of me for speaking the fucking truth.
If you want your children to tell you things, make yourself open. Do not blame them, the school, or anybody you can point fingers at. This is on you, and no deflection will change that. Period.
On a lighter note, if you liked this, you should check out my other articles here! I usually write fictional short stories, but I have plenty of nonfiction on here too if that’s more your speed, and I’ll try to write more about my life. Here are a couple of my articles (one is fiction and the other is nonfiction) to get you started! I swear I’m usually nicer.
Or, you can scroll down to the bottom and see if any of my other articles interest you!
