Looking In The Mirror
It has been over a century since you’ve seen yourself. After all, vampires couldn’t be seen in mirrors up until this point.
You think about the year 1810. This white man said he was going to help you escape the hell you and your people were being put through when, in reality, he found you gullible, and therefore an easy target to sleep with. You told him no, but he did it anyway and turned you into a vampire in the process.
You remember waking up afterward, and trying to look into the mirror and being unable to see yourself. You also had this hunger that could not be quenched with food. He laughed and left you to be captured when you figured him out. You replayed his horrible laughter, and the prior night in your head, and sat, horrified about your new abilities and feeling violated and used as you were awaiting punishment from the family you escaped from.
You eventually embraced your new power, killed the family you were owned by, and reveled in your freedom. You could do whatever you wanted and no one could stop you, just not there. They wanted your head on a stake there, so, you went to a free state where you would be unpunished.
It’s now 1941, and you’ve just gotten yourself a new mirror. Mirrors used to be backed with silver, and now they are backed with liquid mercury. So, now you can see yourself in mirrors again.
Looking into the mirror, you saw golden eyes staring back at you. This startled you at first because you remembered having brown eyes. You reached up to touch your kinky, brown hair and saw your reflection do the same. This is me, you thought.
You pulled the collar of your black dress away from your neck and saw where he bit you. The bite had healed and almost entirely faded over this last century, but it was still there.
Looking in the mirror, you realize you didn’t look groomed, but you don’t remember ever looking presentable. No one cared how you looked, you were barely human to them.
Though, this does explain why every time you walk outside, people (especially white people) stare and shout horrible things at you. You don’t straighten your hair, you don’t wear any makeup because you couldn’t see what you were doing with it anyway, and you walk wherever you want because you know they can’t hurt you.
It’s sad how over a century later, your people are still mistreated. You wish everyone who looked like you had your freedom…but, how could you help? You’re a vampire, they’d hate you too, and what use are you if you can only operate at night lest you go up in flames?
It makes you sick how people like the man that tricked and raped you are still in power. How their skin, their hair, and everything about them is considered prettier and better than yours. How they shout slurs at your people and kill them. Still, after one hundred and thirty-one years, we aren’t free. You’re not free, despite no one being able to hurt you.
So, here you are, looking in the mirror, wondering when it will ever be okay to look in the mirror and love your wider lips and nose, your kinky hair, and your dark skin. Wondering when people will look at you and see beauty in your race. Wondering when your facial features will stop being mocked by the people who think they are more attractive than you.
Looking in the mirror, you wonder when it will ever be okay to look like this.
